:: p-dog ::

More self-absorbed blogging

I have never seen such an energetic group of young people wilt so early. Not my students, my fellow 1st year teachers. I had class tonight until 9, and class yesterday until 10:30. Tonight was actually great--about 13 of us meeting at our supervisor/faculty advisor's house, having dinner, catching up on paper work, and discussing teaching strategies. And in the middle of an engaging discussion on the Pledge of Allegiance in our classrooms, we all began to melt into the floor. Round about 7:30. Exchanging a few rueful barbs about the good old college days of going out at 10 or 11, we concluded we had bypassed several decades of our life and aged from 22 to 40 in 8 months. I don't know what to make of this. In one way, my tendencies have always been slightly old-womanish, so at least this gives me a good excuse for early bedtimes.

[Update on the "this is what is on the test" review we've been doing all week: I still got several blank stares today and questions like, "What test?"]

:: Leslie H - 9:26 PM - ::

Changing perspectives

I was picking up my class yesterday (I make the kids do it before they leave, but I'm still not a master at spotting trash between their feet), and I came across a computer disk label scrawled with, "I gay." Instead of being shocked or saddened by the bigotries that thrive in the student body, I mentally huff, "Mother of God, how long did we spend on linking verbs?!"

The last two days have gone well. Today I tried centers for the first time, a much-touted teaching method where groups rotate through tables in ten-minute slots, doing various activities. It went pretty well, and got only moderately chaotic when they switched tables. And of course it took about twice as long as I'd planned. But I approached it as a learning experience, and once again, my biggest note to self was that instructions and expectations must be absolutely explicit. I gave them a review sheet for our test Friday, entitled: This Is What Is On The Test.

:: Leslie H - 7:12 PM - ::

23 has been the most unremarkable birthday yet. First, I've been telling various people (mostly my 90 students) that I'm 24 for 6 months now. So, in my world, 23 already happened years ago. While 22 felt old in college, I've felt desperately young teaching school, hence the lies. Why do these numbers have such random significance? 22: aren't you still in college? 23: frickin finally. 24: reasonable. 25: ancient.

Add to that, the first birthday card I got was from my car insurance agent, and the second was from TFA. I asked my parents for an eye exam for my gift. I'm not complaining; I just acknowledge that I'm entering the territory of birthdays which are relatively uncelebrated. Better than the next stage (birthdays which are dreaded).

I did have a smashing time in Texas, though it was a bit of a whirlwind. It was wonderful to see people I hadn't talked to since May, and I did a lot of flying around to catch people.

Ugh. I have all these things to say, but they're all sludged up in my head, and it's far easier to sort through worksheets than articulate them. It's unjust to my Texas visit to encapsulate it with those totally empty sentences. But there it is. Maybe summer vacation I'll go back and write it all...



Rejoining the Beer Friday crowd.

:: Leslie H - 1:46 PM - ::

So here I am in Austin, having a fabulous time. It's really freaking me out that it's just Sunday afternoon. I'm still getting used to the idea that Texas is a real place, that I can visit any time I want. Just by getting on a plane. Not a different world at all. I keep looking at my watch and thinking about what I'd normally be doing, at, say, 3:00 on a Saturday. I know tomorrow I'm going to be mentally going through the school day: "Ooh, 3rd period, and I'm not there."

We cooked a fabulous V-day dinner at Clare's last night, which Matt and Seth joined us for. This morning, Clare did another bang-up job on my hair. And shout-outs to those I've seen today: George, Doug, Tim, Donna, Amanda, Chris, Crystal, and the elusive Johnny. Plans were discussed to purchase land in north Cali for a commune. With redwoods, and other flora ;). Tonight: perhaps 80s dancing? We'll see.

As over Christmas, the farther I am geographically from Fischer Middle School, the more unreal my life as a teacher seems. I didn't even bring any work with me this time, to snap me brutally back to reality.

In an amusing twist, I just wrote Matt a recommendation letter for TFA. I don't think it's just the vacation talking--I really would encourage others to do this. As long as they know what they're getting into.

:: Leslie H - 5:33 PM - ::

Just wanted to post in celebration of Cameron's new blog. Welcome to our weird world.

Another Thursday off this week for classroom management training. Bits and pieces of useful information, plus lots on rules and consequences, which I had heard approximately 7,000 times before. Still, it's amazing the energy I have at the end of a non-teaching day. It's also personally comforting (though philosopically dismaying) to talk to other first year teachers in worse shape than I. One math teacher, 40-ish, sitting at my table, had complaints more vitriolic than most. His students were all "stupid" and "lazy" and had no other goal than to screw around and make his life miserable. God knows everyone's entitled to bitching, but I wonder why he teaches with such little faith.

I'm learning what sorts of notes to leave for my subs, too, after a few got run over. An excerpt: "First period is a small but hairy class. It's the "at-risk youth" program. Be positive but strict. There is a stack of office referrals in my desk, which you should make full use of if necessary." It's only fair to warn them.

In news that you don't need to know: my major hip bruise from falling down in the bathtub (because I'm smooth like that) is healing. One student saw it and thought my boyfriend hit me. There's an odd hard spot in the middle that I can only assume is a subterranean scab. Which disturbs me. (If that offended you, please give me credit for not posting the picture. Which of course I took. Blogs are for nothing if not self-indulgence.)

:: Leslie H - 4:08 PM - ::

Apologies for the failure to communicate. I kept thinking I had nothing really to report. But wait, here's something:

BRYAN GOT INTO BERKELEY!

Yes, I know. It's hard to appreciate this as much as I do, when you yourself were not facing either a separation or a move to Seattle. But I'm elated. Well, not elated exactly. Suddenly I can allow myself to consider the future, and speculations bloom: where will we live? (UC Berkeley and Fischer Middle School are about 60 miles apart.) Will we even live together? Can I handle another year of teaching anyway? (I go back and forth on this almost daily.) If not teaching, what else?

But, living complexities aside, it does mean that in two years, we can both be in Berkeley. Finally back in the warm bosom of academia. In from the sleet storm of real-world employment. Where I can just *talk* about saving the world in some overpriced cafe, instead of going out there and actually trying to *do* it. I encourage all of you to come, too.

I tell you, being attached to someone is very worthwhile, but immensely complicating.

Hey, I'll be in Austin this weekend. And I better see all of you.

:: Leslie H - 6:38 PM - ::

The lovely Crystal sent me this postcard months ago, but I just glanced at it on my bulletin board and decided it was worth sharing. I'm still down on teaching. But I'm taking Tuesday off (ha ha!). So that's okay.

:: Leslie H - 9:11 AM - ::